General Board
The Size Acceptance Movement
Posted By: Evoc
Posted: 28 Sep 2005 10:06 am(Two posts, back to back, to follow)
I haven't *had* dark or dismal experiences, Brian, you misread my point. I'm HIGHLY optimistic, but think people are settling too soon for less than equality. There's nothing more optimistic than that in this world, in my opinion. Setlling for the shit you are handed and pretending it's caviar-- now THAT'S pessimism, that's cynical, that's sad.
The point isn't that the havens are inherently evil or ugly (although on occasion they can be for some people.) My point is, what Dim and BBW events provide is a safe-haven type enclave, but little bonafide advancement *beyond.* "Movements" require higher goals and idealism beyond temporary comforts. While teh development of such communities may be a *step*-- it's all it is- a step, not a goal.
Let me reframe this using the issues of the Civil Rights movement(s) of the 60s to illustrate my point. Remember all-black schools, and the concept of "separate but equal"? All-black colleges-- or same gender colleges--even today-- undisputedly provide a sense of safety and understanding for their students that mixed colleges cannot offer, but may have less funding, less opportunities, and graduates have less status in the big world outside. "Seperate but Equal" was deemed inherently unequal. You KNOW this.
Think of Dimensions as an all-fat school, if you will. You have your microculture, your leaders, your social events, and the students are happy as clams-- morale's good, people are feeling accepted, their needs are met. Up the street there is a University called "The Rest of the World" College, and after college, there's "Life in the Rest of the World" awaiting you. In "The Rest of the World", many enjoy things like higher pay, comfortable seating, social acceptance. "The Rest of The World" students don't feel ignored or marginalized- they feel the world is their oyster, and are free to advance to levels of success based on their character.
The problem as I see it is that many people get to Dim/BBW Fat School, enjoy the view or the comraderie, and stay there for life as "Gradual Students"... you know, the kids who become RAs, work in the Admissions Office, and never graduate. They enjoy the comforts the crowd provides, but few of the perks-- money, across the board acceptance, physical accomodations- that The Rest of The World provides most of its members.
Saying that "Size Acceptance" has come a long way is like saying civil rights for blacks have come a long way. Racism dead yet? Hardly! While there's some truth to the notion that advancements have been made, there's still a hell of a long way to go, and time spent congratulating ourselves and patting ourselves on the back - to my mind--eventually becomes time wasted, when there's still such a very long distance to travel.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________The thing is, Brian, I don't *require* a haven, just a venue. This is one of many boards I participate in-- others are about music, or activism, or education and the like, and in those venues, I hold my own and feel equally secure. You might argue, "Sure you do, because that can't SEE your fat self", but I make sure they do. Also, in real life, I belong to several clubs and groups related to my interests- not my physical appearance-- and I a have a great group of friends who-- as demonstrated before-- look like they came out of a Gap ad and don't give me any trouble about the fact that I don't. I work with over 800 children and adults every single day, and not one of them has ever made mention of or mistreated me because of my weight-- even though I am at least 100 pounds larger than anyone else. My dating experiences with the "non-FA" crowd have been no less fulfilling than the FAs were.
I do understand that maybe my results "are not typical"-- but I wish they were. I know that many fat people have a much harder time in the "real world" than I do, and understand why they feel such security in the BBW/FA enclaves--- I just believe that the sense of security may be a false one unless they never venture outside the group. Get what you need and move on, I think, would be my message. Stay in touch, but have a whole life in the world outside.
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